Internet eh?
The first time I logged onto the internet, I was in college. I'm sure that is something that Elliott will find both mortifying and embarrassing when he is a teenager. Living 18 years without the internet will be as baffling a concept to him as watching Disney movies on VHS, hand-writing letters and televisions with rabbit ears.
And today, I am still about as savvy on the world wide interweb as I was 11 years ago. Not long ago, after our old computer fried both of its hard drives in one glorious meltdown, we purchased an iMac. I pushed for the iMac because it was user friendly and hardly ever crashed or got viruses. Of course, within 24 hours I had succeeded in freezing up our new computer and forcing a restart. It's a gift.
But even with my technological woes I literally can not fathom how anyone got anything accomplished before the internet. What did people do when they needed to go somewhere they'd never been before? Seriously! Did we have to pull out one of those giant unwieldy maps each time? To date I can't even give someone accurate directions to my own house. Who do I look like? Magellan? Just plug it into Mapquest.
And the information! Goodness gracious! What did we do in a world where we couldn't find out where we recognized that girl on Entourage from in a mere 10 seconds? Did such a time really exist?
Quite frankly, I don't know how babies were kept alive before the internet. It's remarkable. Google itself is like having a million incredibly unqualified and misinformed doctors at your fingertips. Shelbi and I probably type an Elliott-related question into Google at least once a day. "When can babies have ibuprofen?" "Why is my baby's poop green?" "Are vaccines really necessary?" Etc...
And we are obviously not the only ones doing this. What I love about Google is that whatever you start to type in, the Web site instantly provides you with the most popular searches that start in a similar fashion. Type the words "When can" into Google and the first 8 suggestions you get are about pregnancy. The other two are about taxes. I think that sums up what people worry about pretty succinctly. And we do worry. Sweet mercy do we worry. And we come to the internet to confirm that our most benign worries are justified.
Type anything that your baby has or is doing into google and the chances are on the first page or results you will find someone telling you your baby is gravely ill or going to die.
My baby has a bump on its head: It's a brain tumor.
How much should my baby be going to the bathroom?: If it's not enough it probably has a bowel obstruction and will need surgery.
Is my baby too fat?: Yes, it has juvenile diabetes.
My baby is struggling with nursing: It's going to get dehydrated. You're a terrible parent.
My baby isn't rolling over yet: Autism
My baby stares at the dog: Autism
My baby likes TV: Autism
Shelbi is a professional internet surfer. She can find the answer to anything and find some truly obscure Web sites. As I mentioned in a previous post, I will occasionally walk in and find her crying in front of the computer. This is most likely because she has stumbled across a blog about someone who lost a child or has a toddler with spina bifida. When she was pregnant she found an entire site that was in remembrance of people who had stillborn children. Heck, just recently there was even a story that received huge publicity because of a mention on Oprah about a baby... named Elliot... with a heart murmur... who died after 99 days. Wonderful.
Of course, the internet has actually saved us probably a dozen trips to the emergency room. Our pediatrician is terrific about responding to e-mails quickly and is one of the least worrisome individuals I have ever met.
Elliott has bumps on his head: "Yeah, those spots are really weird... It's probably nothing." And she was right!
Elliott has a cough: "Yep, babies can cough."
Elliott's throwing up a ton: "He's sick. Give him Tylenol and Pedialite."
We love her.
I've always wondered what doctors think of medical sites. It has to be frustrating dealing with hypochondriac's coming in all the time with the latest webmd diagnosis. "I have this itch on my arm. Webmd thinks its leprocy, so I thought I'd get it checked out." Usually when I've asked doctors, there's a clear trend related to their age. The young doctors seem to like the medical sites and think more information is generally a good thing. The older (code: authoritarian) doctors have a look like they've considered bombing webmd's servers.
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